my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Moan for me like Helen Keller
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
