Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
me + whiskey = a bad person
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
