Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
