Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
