I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
