it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
