i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
