I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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