Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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