He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Randomize
