your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize