I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
