Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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