Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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