Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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