Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
