The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
