i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize