Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize