i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize