I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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