Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
