Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
