You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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