So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
