You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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