So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
whose ass print is on the piano?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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