oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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