My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
