Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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