How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
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