theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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