we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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