I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm getting married
To pizza
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
