College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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