we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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