we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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