THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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