Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize