Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
