brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize