the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
