I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
