Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Michael Bay diarrhea
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
