I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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