i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
