Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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