I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
