i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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