I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
