And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
