I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
